Friday, June 27, 2008


Pressure comes from all over the place. Parents, friends, schools, society...

How do you know what you're doing out of pressure and what you're doing because you actually want to? What about what you're not doing? How do you stay yourself while still living up to what others want you to be doing?

I know, it's easy to say - "Live your own life! Don't give in to pressure!" But sometimes that's just not possible, you know? Or just very, very hard.


Anonymous said...

How do you know what you're doing out of pressure and what you're doing because you actually want to?

Well, don't you feel differently, depending? I always feel a drop resentful if I feel even slightly forced to do something.

In the end, you gain some, you lose some. I'm not getting a nose-stud because society tells me not to, but I refuse to let them tell me what to wear when I walk out of my house in the morning for a day of shopping.

Daphne said...

A lot of what we do is because of pressure. And that’s not necessarily a bad thing either. What’s important is to keep yourself from giving in to pressure. If we are doing things because of pressure, yet those things make sense to us and seem good to us, then that’s not bad. But if we are doing things solely because of pressure, without agreeing with it - that’s when we're giving in.

And yes, there are those times that we have no idea if we agree with what we're doing. I think the best thing to do is to try to honestly evaluate our actions as often as possible. The fact that you wrote this post shows that you’re already doing that.

Remember our Bachira talk? I think it relates :)

SuperRaizy said...

When trying to make a decision, it often helps me to think about "the day after"- what are the consequences of my decision that I will have to live with the day after I make it? Once I can visualize the changes that will occur in my life if I decide to do this or that, it usually becomes pretty clear what the right thing to do is.

Ezzie said...

One thing I haven't understood the last couple of days: Isn't this exactly the answer to this post?!

Northern Light said...

Attitude is everything...if you redefine "pressure" as "options" or "nudges to get things done" or even "ways to please others," that can help a lot.

If by "pressure" you mean only "things I really don't want to do but am forced to out of fear or obligation" I daresay that you choose to respond to that fear or obligation. What would happen if you didn't respond to the pressure?