Although I don't really have the time to spare writing a blog entry this afternoon, I also just finished taking a very draining final and need to chill for a moment or two, so I figured blogging might be a good release.
Last night was the annual Midnight Madness at Schottenstien dorm. What is this madness, you ask? Well, the Student Council decided that since we're all in the middle of finals, we might like to have some ice cream and pancakes in the middle of the night to help us get through studying! Great idea. The problem is, for someone like me who does not particularly enjoy crowds, it became very overwhelming. I really, really, really wanted pancakes. I did. But I just couldn't go down there. You see, large crowds tend to frighten me, especially large noisy crowds all stuffed into one lounge. So I hesitated, I reconsidered, I tried to assess whether I really wanted that pancake or could go without, and then I stood up and told myself, "No. No, you do want that pancake. You really do! And you are going to march straight down there, barge in, and get your pancake!"
Yes! I will get my just desert! I know, I know, that didn't make much sense, but I just had to say it.
Anyway, that's what I did. Of course, all of a sudden, as I was waiting for my pancake to finish cooking, I realized that I was still wearing my slippers. Ah well, I decided. It was so crowded in that room, no one would even notice. And the crowd was rather overwhelming. I couldn't wait to get out of there. It made me feel so small, so...insignificant. Here I was, little me, in the midst of a huge, noisy crowd of girls all pushing and shoving to get their pancakes and ice cream. I did not belong there. No, no. I belonged in the safety of my quiet room studying the philosophy of the Rambam.
I eventually did manage to make my escape, and with not only two pancakes (instead of just the one I intended on getting, since the person making them flipped another onto my plate before I could so much as back out of my spot at the table) but also with a bowl of mint chocolate chip ice cream, which is my absolute favorite! So all in all, it was good. All's well that end's well, huh? I also managed to get myself a black Stern zip-up sweatshirt. I figured I might as well, seeing as I already gathered the courage to plunge into the monstrous crowd and I didn't own any Stern or YU apparel as of yet anyway.
So there you go. The experience did make me a bit disgusted with myself, though. I mean, I don't want to be so insecure, to have so little confidence as to be afraid of going into the back lounge just to get some pancakes! Something I'll have to work on for next year. I must be braver in these social situations.
I mean, I must have a record here. I'm a junior at Stern and I've never even been up to YU! Well, once, sort of, to pick up the guys on the debate team, but that doesn't count seeing as I didn't even get off the bus.
3 comments:
Ah yes. They came up with that brilliant idea my junior or senior year, I believe. I certainly don't recall them ever having it before then. It can definitely be an overwhelming experience, even for people who aren't nervous in crowds. But think about it this way--at least Schott back lounge is bigger than Brookdale's back lounge! Can you imagine the chaos if they tried to have it there?!
Ohyoufunnychild! You should have sticked around longer and spotted me! I came all the way from Brookdale! And ate pancakes and ice cream and chocolate and ice coffee and strawberries and blueberries! And it was so overwhelming but it's so fun because I saw all my friends! Everyone is yelling and pushing, but you see someone you never see across the room and you go over and jump up and down and hyperize, and then you spot someone else, etc! And had I seen you I would have made you do that instead of be dull and study! And I'm also scared of YU but this year I had to go there a ton of times for things--usually more than once a week, and I'm not quite as scared anymore, and you should get more involved in lots of things and you shouldn't be so insecure because you're supercool and it will all be funner! Yay!
Aw, too bad I missed you! Next year, I will go to YU. I will! There's no way I'm graduating from Stern having never been there. We should go there together and get YU people to write for our literary journal that we ARE going to start because that will be awesomely awesome! Yaaaaay!
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