Monday, May 19, 2008

The dangers of being an English major

1. You use words from Canterbury Tales in boggle and think they're real
2. You spell things the British way and think it's normal
2.5 American spellings sometimes look weird to you...like they're missing something - a 'u' perhaps.
3. Your writing teacher tells you that you tend to sound..."rather Victorian" in your stories
4. You like sounding "rather Victorian" and writing in a more modern fashion bores you
5. It makes you cringe to read all that modern stuff that hits you over the head with all its brilliant symbolism
6. It makes you cringe to read stories that try to sound like Jane Austen but just can't pull it off. At all.
7. You get irrepressible urges to correct everyone's grammar and you can't stop yourself, even though you know it's annoying
8. There are so many classics still calling out to be read, you just don't have time to focus on the stuff everyone else is reading
9. You have no answer when people ask the famous "what are you going to do with that?" question
10. For some odd, unexplainable reason, everyone seems to be asking you to write papers when you just can't anymore

1 comment:

ProfK said...

Then there is the greatest danger of them all--you get the urge to do something with your English major, so you begin to teach English, and in the process you create other English majors who look around in befuddlement and bewilderment, with no idea as to how they came to be in their present predicament. And...it's...all...your...fault.